Top Ten Reasons Why Husbands Should Go Out of Town Occasionally

10. Gives us an opportunity to catch up on projects we’ve long neglected.  Or, perhaps, start writing a novel.

9. Every woman should be forced to kill a giant wolf spider – or two – in her living room occasionally.

8. Saves money – the company’s paying for his food and gas.

7. An opportunity to assert our independence by doing manly things like taking out the trash and putting salt in the softener (for the first time ever – yeah, me!).

6. Throw chicken nuggets and mac-n-cheese on the table.  Everybody’s happy! (Uh, vegan and organic, of course.) 🙂

5. It’s SO much easier to make the bed when only one person has slept in it.

4. Watch the Twilight series – again – with no complaints from the other person on the couch… ’cause there is no other person on the couch.

3. No need to feign a headache. (What, me? No, never!)

2. Sharing dog-poop-picker-upper duties is over-rated.  It’s far better to be the sole poop-picker-upper.  Three times a day.   Every day.  Big poop, little poop.  Sock-filled poop, rainy day poop.  I’ve had enough of poop.

And the number one reason why it’s good for husbands to go out of town occasionally…. (Drum roll, please)….

1. No need to blush or attempt to hide the occasional flatulent expulsion.

OK, honey.  I’ve had my fun.  The spiders are dead, the kids have eaten the nuggets, the poop’s picked up, and I’m flatulent-free.  Please come home.

2 comments on “Top Ten Reasons Why Husbands Should Go Out of Town Occasionally
  1. Dana Lashley says:

    Lol

  2. The Husband says:

    Since the chores are all done, I’ll be home soon, Honey.

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