Self Talk

I pulled up to Meijer this afternoon to do some school shopping. Nearby, a man was leaning over the passenger seat of his car, and I assumed he was changing a baby’s diaper. As I walked toward the store, the man started yelling, presumably at the poor child whose diaper he was changing.  I hesitated, concerned for the child’s welfare.  The more I heard, the more worried I became.  F-ing this and f-ing that, GD this, and GD that.  I was horrified.  I approached the car in a circumspect manner, wanting to see if there was, indeed, a child in the car.  Fortunately, there was not.  Indeed, this man’s tirade was directed at himself.  I can only guess that he had lost his keys after putting his purchases in the car, and since his car was filled with junk (does he live out of it?), it was going to take a lot to find them.

This man continued to carry on as I walked toward the store, berating himself for being an F-ing idiot, and lamenting that God had even made such a piece of sh…

Immediately prior to my shopping trip, I had spent nearly an hour in the Blessed Sacrament Chapel, praying for one of my children who is going through a very rough time emotionally.  This wonderful child seems to be developing a more and more pessimistic view of the world.  Sadly, the things we do to try to build our baby up seem to go unnoticed, while everything that could possibly bring the child down is the start of a downward spiral that sometimes takes hours or even days to hit rock bottom.

As I walked into Meijer I prayed for this man.  How sad to see a person beating himself up over such a human mistake.  (Only last week I left my purse and cell phone in the shopping cart at Kroger and didn’t realize it till twenty minutes later!)

As I walked out of Meijer an hour later, it struck me that, if we don’t figure out a way to help our child now, our child could one day be the man outside of Meijer, beaten down under a barrage of negative self talk.

And so I set to work with renewed vigor.  Perhaps its the lack of routine over the summer?  So tomorrow we’ll have a schedule.  Perhaps we’re not spending enough one-on-one time?  We’ll be sure to get that scheduled (although, we tend to see flare ups on days when we’ve spent the most time together.)  Perhaps I can whisper happy thoughts while the child sleeps?  Sure, I’ll give it a shot.

I am a beloved child of God.  I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

My God is awesome, and I am made in the image and likeness of my God, so I am awesome too.

Mom and Dad love me.  God loves me.  Jesus loves me.  There is so much to love about me!

What d’ya think?

 

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